Funny SMS

Husband & wife are like liver and kidney.
Husband is liver & wife is kidney.
If liver fails, kidney fails.
If kidney fails, liver manages with other kidney.


*****************
Boy: I am not rich like rohit, 
I don't even have a bid car like
rohit. But I really love you!
Girl: I love you too, but tell
me more about rohit..


*****************
Who said English is easy???
Fill in the blank with YES or No…
1.—–I dont have brain…
2.—–I dont have sence…
3.—–I am stupid….


**************** 
A Love Letter from BISCUIT MAKER- 
Dear Marie, Today is Good Day, 
U r Anmol for me... But U have
Crackjacked my Heart, Bcoz
I have a Little Heart, Now
I m in 50/50 position...

***************
Commerce professor asks the student: 
what is the most important source of 
finance for starting business?
Student: "Father in law".

**************** 
Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?
Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes. 


*************** 
Calendar of Love
January = Rose
February = Propose
March = Gift
April = Lift
May = Chatting
June = Dating
July = Miss
August = Kiss
September = Marriage
October = Broke up
November = Rest
December = Next
Have a nice year ahead. 


**************** 
What is the difference between
Monkey & Donkey ?
Monkey saves this message
&
Donkey deletes this message.

Choice is urs……..:


***************** 

Age of drinks;
1 to 3 milk
3 to 8 cerelac
9 to 13 horlicks
14 to 25 bear
26 to 40 whisky
41 to 60 tonic
after 60 anytime
“GANGA JAL.....

******************
Patient: Please don’t give me the injection.
I’m afraid of it’s pain.
Doctor: Don’t worry!!
I’ll inject you first that kills the pain!!!! 


*******************
He+She= Love.
He+She+Love=Marriage.
He+She+Love+Marriage=Child.
He+She+Love+Marriage+Child=Family.
AND
He+She+Love+Marriage+Child+ Family=Problem.
So my dear friend
Be careful. 

***************** 
You are ABCD
Attractive beautiful cute dear
EFG
Excellent funny gorgeous
HIJ
Hello I am joking ;) 

******************* 
Funny Text -Ik pagal rail ki ptri pe so gya
Ik aadmi ne kaha kya kr rhy ho train ayegi 
to mrjaoge Pagal:Mere uprse JAHAZ guzr
gya to kch ni hua TRAIN NAY KYA KR LENA hai

*****************


KOI ANKHON SE BAAT KAR LETA HAI,
KOI ANKHON MEIN MULAQAT KAR LETA HAI,
BARA MUSHKIL HOTA HAI JAWAB DENA,
JAB KOI ENGLISH MAIN BAAT KAR LETA HAI.;-) 

*****************

Hr khu§hi hansi mange apse.
Hr phool khushbu mange aap§e.
Itni ro§hni ho aapki zindagi main k
khud bijli wale conection mange aap§e.. ;)  

******************

Dhoka mila jub bhi pyar main,
Zindgi main udasi chaa gayee..
Socha tha chor dengay is raah ko,
Kambakht phir 1 new number se miss call Aagai   

*******************
Suno gaur se PEPSI walo
buri nazar na COKE pe dalo
chahe jitna DEW pila lo
sabse aage hoga NEEMBU PANI
hamne piya hai tum bhi piyo....

******************
Ek Hizde ne power plus ki goli kha li,
To body k ander se aawaz aayi,
Maafi chahte hai aapke system me
Yeh suvidha uplabdh nahi hai,
Eeeor: No
Hardware found.

********************
Aaj kal tum muskuraati bohot ho
Mere dil ko bhaati bohot ho
Dil kehta hai le jaoon tumhain dinner per
Per suna hai tum khaati bohot ho!

*********************
PHOOL BINA KHUSHBU BEKAAR
CHANDANI BINA CHAND,BEKAAR
PYAAR BINA ZINDAGI BEKAAR AUR
GIRL-FRIEND KE BINA CARTOON-NETWORK BEKAAR

*********************
Today i was cooking chicken when i added green palak.

Chicken started singing & dancing :

" HUM PE YE KIS NE HARA RANG DALA

MAR DALA MAR DALA " 

**********************

When i call you..

1. Ringing means i m thinking u.

2. Ringing means i like u.

3. Ringing means i miss u.

4. Ringing means i need u.

5. Ringing means behray phone utha...

*********************

aap zindagi main buhat agay jaow gay

buhat agay jaow gay......... ......

kiuke

app jahan bhi jawo gay sab app say

ye kahain gain

"chal bay chal agay chall"

***************

Aahat si koi aye to lagta hai ki tum ho.

Hawa koi lehrayi to lagta hai ki tum ho.

Ab tum hi batao,

kya tum kisi BHOOT se kam ho ?

**************** 

Teri yaad mein humne kalam uthaayi

liya paper aur tasveer aapki bnayi

socha tha ki usko dil se laga kar rakhenge

magar vo to bacho ko draane ke kaam aayi...

******************

Shaam hote hii ye Dil udaas hota hai

Toote khwaboo ke siwa kuch na pass hota hai

Tumahri yaad aise waqt bohat aati hai

Bandar jab koi aas-paas hota hai..

*******************

Tumko dekha to yeh khyaal aaya

Tumko dekha to yeh khyaal aaya

Ki Paaglo ke stock mein Naya Maal Aaya

*******************

sharab samaj ka 1 dushman hai,

Aoao milke kasam khaye,

is dushman ko khatam karen gay.

ek botal tum khatam karo,

ek botal hum khatam karen gay...

********************

Tu Chaand maange main Chaand de du,

tu raat maange main raat de du,

Tu dil maange main dil de du,

Tu Jaan maange......

Abe bas Departmental Store samajh rakha hai kya???

*******************

It’s very easy
to eat sweet chocolate,
speak sweet words,
watch sweet dreams
but
It’s very difficult
to
find a sweet person.
but I salute you.
that you find me.

 
*******************

What is similarity between Bill Gates and me?
Don’t know??
He never comes to my house
and I never go to his house
EGO PROBLEMS YOU KNOW…


*******************

Teacher: Tomorrow there will be a lecture on Sun.
Everyone must attend it.
Raju: No! I will not be able to attend it.
Teacher: Why?
Raju: My mother will not allow me to go so far !!


*******************

Maths teacher asked JOHNY
“If u have 12 chocalate and u give 5 to DONA,
3 to ALICE and 4 to ROMA then wat will u get ?
JOHNY replied “Sir! 3 new girl friends”.



*******************

Are you idiot?
Why you keep sending me SMS?
Who gave my number to you?
Never message me again.
Did I ever said that.
Than why don’t you sending SMS.


*******************

A student wrote a letter
to his father from hostel:
Dear dad…!
No money,No fun.
Your son!
His father replied:
Dear son!
So sad,Very bad
Your dad!


*******************

Best frnd isn't who says
'WO teri kismat me nhi hai use bhol ja'

but best frnd is 1 who says:
'TU Parhai par dhiyan day.
Ghar se utha layen gay use':D

*******************

*.*NAMAZ*.*
iss taraah parho jesey ALLAH ka deedaar kar rahey ho...
*.*DUA*.*
Esey maango jesey ALLAH sey bheek maang rahey ho...
*.*DOLAT*.*
Esey rakho jesey aik,aik pesey mein paseeney ki boo aa rahi ho...
*.*ROZA*.*
Esey rakho jesey zindagi kay GUNAH aik hi rozey mein khatam ho rahey hon...
*.*DIL*.*
ko esa banaao jesey dil mein hi RAB ko pa rahey ho.

*******************

Sardar ka Padosi Mar Gaya:

Wo Uske Ghar Gaya or Pucha: Body Aa Gai Kya?

Tabhi Body Lekar Ambulance Aa Gayi.


Sardar: Lo Batao,




Kitni Lambi Umar Hai. :-)

*******************

New Morning
+
New Aim
+
New Achievement
+
Ur Dedication
+
Commitment
=
Success
Just do it & win it
Good Morning
HaVe A lUcKy SuNdAy

*******************

Achi Baat Tou Sab Ko Achi Lagti Hai..

Lekin Jub Tumhain Kisi Ki Buri Baat Bhi Buri Na Lage To Smjo..


Tmhain zZalil h0ne ki aadat ho gayi Hai :-D

*******************

New style of proposing

Boy: can i take a photo.

Girl: why?

Boy: just wanted 2 show my children How their mom looked in Her younger age. . . 

*******************

Ye padh lena
important hy ... Exam mein
pakka pucha jaye ga


.

1.Roll no
2.Exam
3.Date
4.Subject

Ab thanks bol kr rulaaye
ga kia?

Anything 4 u dude ... ;-> 

*******************
  

Husband: tum aesi roti nahi bana sakhti jesi meri ammi pakati thi.
Wife: paka sakti hun agar tum be aeisa aata goondo jesa tumhare abbu goonda krty thy.

*******************

ApKo Meri Kon C Aadat Zeher Lgti Hai ?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Reply Krne ki koi zaroorat nahi pehle apni adatein theek karo..!ok
Haha


*******************
  

I was The Most Outstanding Student Of My Class ...






Because,







I Always Stand Outside The Class:-)



Proud 2 b an Out-Standing Student.

*******************

 For a nice friend
"nice morning"..

For a sweet friend
"sweet morning"

For a loving friend
"lovely morning"

For a Good friend
"Good Morning"

*******************

Wife: Sirf Mere Liye He Paan Kyon Le Rahe Ho?
Apne Liye Bhi Le Lo...

.
.
.
.
.

Husband: Mai Bina Paan Khaye Bhi Chup Reh Sakta Hon. :-)

*******************

Padhai sirf do wajah se hoti hai?
ek
shauk se
aur
ek khauf se
Shauk hume he nahi
aur
Khauf to hame
kisi ka bhi nahi he

To Jiyo bindas...

 *******************
If I was an artist,
you would be my picture!
If I was a poet,
you would be my inspiration!
If I was an author you would be my story!

But I'm only a cartoonist!

 *******************